New Years Today
What the fuck are you doing this New Years!? It’s the biggest party of the year! The most music the most riotous behaviour, the biggest concentration of sequins in one place and one time!, the most alcohol consumed, the most nudity before 2am, and the most drag seen in one 12 hour period! Not to [...]
War on packet foods part three: Hummus
I’d like to give you my recipe for hummus. I learnt this recipe in my first summer out of school, working at a vineyard. It was a great summer, one of those ones where it was sunny every day, the boys were good looking, wine was aplenty (obviously) and I was cruising round with my [...]
Adventure Tourism and The Pigeon
Two of our favourite contributors, Chachi Bonch and Mackaveli, have joined forces to report to us from the US. Even though they are experts in modern communication, they surprised us with this report via the trusty ol postal service. It’s taken just over a month for the letter to reach us at MMP HQ. Its [...]
I serve coffee, but that doesn’t mean I’m some sort of sub-human
I simply do not understand why people do it. I know, I serve coffee, but that doesn’t mean I’m some sort of sub-human. So why is it that some people show so little manners it appears as though they think I am. The most easily recognisable of this degradation in social etiquette is the age [...]
Sell Outs
Luther is grumpy today. I feel like having a rant. And I’m going to start with Fergie. I hate that bitch. Come on, she named her single Fergalicious for fucks sake. What a tool. And it’s not just because her music’s shit that makes Luther hate her. Back in 2001, Luther’s music taste wasn’t quite [...]
In praise of Hissyfit
I had my first proper weekend away in the sun this past few days – sad, I know – and just grabbed the sunblock nearest to me when I left the house. This happened to be Hissyfit’s Body Double, and it’s wonderful smell reminded me immediately why I spent all of last Summer lathered head [...]
A little help from my friends
Does anyone have a phone number for any of these babes? I need a date for a dinner on new years eve. I think one of these “brabes” would suit me nicely. Many thanks, Sonny. This cloth-brabe is dressed perfectly for a humid night in Sydney. Yeah yeah this proves I like a Ricky Martin [...]
Anna Pavlova The Saucy Minx
Now, if I may, I’d like to tell you a little something about my Gran. Gran was a beautiful woman who never let the truth get in the way of a good story. She was artistic, clever, cheeky and wise. And the one nugget of wisdom from Gran that I have held on to, and [...]