Nameless face #20
You know this guy, he’s your Daddy…just listen to his raspy voice and look at his angry face and his tan leather…

But do you know his name? I mean you know him from “There’s Something About Mary” right? As Cameron Diaz’s daddy. You know him from “Requiem for a Dream” right? As the drug dealer who sets up the two way anal dildo situation for Jennifer Connely, if you haven’t I bet I have sparked your interest.

Look now he’s laughing at you.
Maybe you know him from “Dead Presidents” or “Clockers” because your brother was a “wigga” when you were little?
Or, perhaps you are a little older and know him from “Platoon” or even “Roadhouse”, because let’s be honest Patrick Swayze kicks ass! Don’t fuck with me on this point, he can kick ass and he can dance, he can make pottery and love, he’s like Kevin Bacon but better.

OK, so there is a chance you haven’t seen any of these movies because you’ve had your head stuck up your ass, so you will know him from these classics: “Stomp the Yard 2″, “Behind Enemy Lines: Columbia and Axis of Evil”, “Transporter 2″, “Chronicles of Riddick”, “Spider-Man”, “Agent Cody Banks 1 and 2″ with the little dooshlord from Malcolm without a diddle.
Or maybe you will remember him from “Mr and Mrs Smith” or “Barbershop” (wigga die hard) or “Superhero Movie”.
Don’t judge him, firstly he’ll kick your ass Patrick Swayze style and secondly… what you don’t think you didn’t sell out by going to Law School?… chump.

The man can wear a white suit, what is he, some kind of GOD? Pretty much.
Now I’m not even going to go into the plethora of TV show’s our man has been in because it’s a list as long as a black man’s…, but I’m gonna throw you a frikkin’ bone with these last three films you should know him from…
Firstly, “Crash”, not the Cronenberg one which was genius, but the recent one which everyone else thought was genius.
Secondly, “Reality Bites”, come on, how did he get in this movie? Have you ever seen the the book “Things White People Like”, there is a whole section about this movie, in fact there is a whole section in there about you!
Thirdly, the greatest piece of POP-ART cinema and the most perfect of the Michael Bay/Jerry Bruckheimer orgyfest film making extravagances… “Armageddon”!!!

Look at him T.C.B baby… he is so cool and tough and masculine he can even stand up to Bruce Willis in the movies!
In fact this is so cool there is even another semi-famed nameless face with his name but back to front. This guy…

What a babe… he’s from “An Officer and a Gentleman”, “Firestarter” and “U-571″ for god’s sake! You should know him by now, you’re probably related to him, you certainly look like him!
His name is David Keith, like a good ol’boy…
So our man… with the bit between his teeth is…

Keith David, remember it or I will resurrect Swayze to kick your ass!


fricken hilarity!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!