Awards:

Best in the sun: Metronomy really are the perfect summer band. How on earth are they from Britain?

Best to dance to: I found the overalls crowds in America very, very tame. Only during  a few shows over the whole weekend did people dance and/or mosh – The Rapture easily being the best for it.

Refused also get an honourable mention in the latter camp.

Biggest Miss: Azealia Banks. Too early in the day so I missed it by 15 mins. I have no doubt ‘212’ would’ve been one of the bigger tunes of the festival.

Honourable mentions: Araabmuzik, Death Grips, Andrew Bird, Beirut.

The ‘how are they still playing main stage in a decent timeslot’ award: A tie between Kaiser Chiefs and The Hives. It’s 2012 not 2006.

Most iconic site: The Ferris Wheel. It really does look amazing both during the day and during the night and it is the first thing I think of when I think Coachella.

Honourable mention: The Palm Trees – nothing screams Cali more.

Worst time slot (for the crowd): The Black Keys as a headliner. Does anyone love them or does everyone just kinda like them? I am not sold on them in a primetime slot.

Honourable mention: Bon Iver, I might be in the minority but I would’ve much preferred a late afternoon/early evening slot from them.

Worst time slot (for an artist): Avichii. Mega guts at having to go head-to-head with Dre + Snoop on the Sunday night.

Honourable mention: Anything on pre 2:30 (an impossible slot for the non-campers)

Favourite Accident: On Sunday I was well excited to see Araabmuzik and trotted off solo to his tent as I couldn’t by a friend to accompany me. After about 15 mins though I realised I was in the wrong one (all 3 are next door and look identical) and I was actually watching The Gaslamp Killer. But it was incredible so I ended up staying. He mixes hip hop/dubstep including his own remixes of ‘Niggas in Paris’, ‘I Wanna Be your Dog’ and the Star Wars ‘Imperial March’. Boss.

Biggest praise: To the shuttle drivers. Comfy buses, never a wait, great music AND they let you drink on them. Very tidy operation.

Biggest gripe: It has definitely fallen into Glastonbury zone of being a festival for people who aren’t really into music but just want to ‘tick it off’. So many Frat boys it may have well been called Bro-chella.

Dishonourable mention: Only being able to drink in designated areas and not by the stages.

Most enjoyable person I danced 2 metres away from: Usher during Dre + Snoop. Yeah, yeah.

Top Song: Extremely tough category but I will have to go with Radiohead ‘After the Goldrush/Everything in its Right Place’. Thom Yorke covered Neil Young exceptionally well and then blended it into the ‘Kid A’ highlight (though I basically could’ve included their whole 6 song, 40min encore).

Honourable mention: SBTRKT’s ‘Wildfire’ remix of the Drake remix. Big tune gets even bigger.

Best Act: Dre + Snoop, obviously. It is the act that has been most talked about and quite rightly so. Just an amazing set featuring cameos from Eminem, 50 Cent, Wiz Kalifa, Warren G, Kurupt, Kendrick Lamar and of course ‘2Pac’. It was a barrage of surprises each topping the last and the set list was incredible. The hologram performance definitely raises some ethical questions but to see that live was an experience I will never forget – and it will go down not only as an iconic Coachella moment but a global musical milestone. (PS set list after the jump)

Most jacked rapper: For the first 4 or 5 songs of Dre + Snoop I just couldn’t stop staring at how ripped Dre has got. I wasn’t sure if I have should be amazed or grossed out but which ever way it screams mid life crisis.

Honourable mention to MC Ride form Death Grips – that guy is a beast.

Best Sing-along: Nothing tops a festival crowd sing-along and when the instrumental for Snoop’s ‘Ain’t No Fun’ came on the whole crowd immediately knew what was required of them. And we obliged by rapping every bar of Nate Dogg’s (revolting but hilarious) verse. Incredible moment.

Weekend Winners/Losers

Winners: Holograms, Del Taco, Red Cups, Walmart, Matt + Matt, Shuttles, ESPN Deportes, Motel pools, Relative lack of lines once inside, Guest appearance, Streaming on Youtube, David Guetta jokes,

Losers: Work today, Fruit + Veg, Security searches (“this is not your package”), Walmart, Midriff (is it coming back? I hope not), $9 beers, $7 pizza slices,  Being dark at 6pm, 2nd weekend now that the surprises are spoiled, David Guetta,

Bands Seen:

Friday: Girls, Wu Lyf, The Rapture, The Black Keys, Explosions in the Sky, Refused

Saturday: Tune-Yards, Noel Gallagher, Kasabian, SBTKRT, Bon Iver, ASAP Rocky, Radiohead

Sunday: Metronomy, Santigold, Fitz and the Tantrums, Gaslamp Killer, The Weeknd, Girl Talk, At the Drive In, Dre + Snoop

Dre + Snoop Set List:

Firstly, I just want to say that I thought 2011 was a great year for music. There were at least 15-20 albums I generally loved and I have spent a good few weeks chopping and changing my final 11, then a few more figuring out what order they should go in. I must admit I took my self-imposed responsibilities far too seriously.

If you don’t have time (or just can’t be bothered) to read the whole thing – I have included hash tag summaries to allow you to skim through and get on with your day.

First off honourable mentions for Bon Iver, Danger Mouse & Danielle Rossi, Planningtorock, Gil Scott-Heron & Jamie xx, Forest Fire and James Blake. #nextcabsofftherank

11. Kate Bush – 50 Words for Snow: Highly controversial pick as it only came out a week or two ago but I immediately loved it. I still don’t really know what the hell it is about but track titles like ‘Snowflake’, ‘Snowed in at Wheeler Street’ and ‘50 Words for Snow’ start to give you an idea. It is only 7 tracks long but clocks in at well over an hour and features some stunning arrangements. #1neige2schnee3sneeuw 4neu….

10. The Antlers – Burst Apart: I have tried to write about these guys before and always struggle to come up with things to say. There doesn’t appear to be anything remotely remarkable or marketable about them. A four-piece indie group from Brooklyn – how many of those are there around? But they continue to put out critically acclaimed records. Words like ‘atmosphere’ and ‘intelligent’ often get use, and I think they would probably appeal to fans of Arcade Fire and Radiohead. #hipsterhospice

9. SBTRKT – SBTRKT: When I first heard this album I must admit to a wave of anticippointment. I guess I wanted it all to sound like first single ‘Wildfire’ and it didn’t at all.  But as the months went by I grew to love it and I think it is the best offering from the post-dub-step/singer songwriter sound that really defined the year for me (in the UK at least). Better than the 3 James’s – Jamie xx, James Blake and Jamie Woon. #pubstep

8. Action Bronson – Dr Lecter: It is said that you have to know the past to understand the present and Queens based, Albanian born rapper Action Bronson would no doubt agree with this. No auto-tune, no pop star hooks just throwback 90s East Coast rap. If Ghostface Killah spent 60 minutes rapping about gourmet food this is the album he would end up with. #michelinstarred

7. tUnE-YarDs – w h o k i l l: Tune Yards is Merrill Garbus who makes ‘looped’ music  la Liam Finn. Her music is centred around the ukulele, drums and her very distinctive voice, you will either be completely transfixed or utterly irritated. I am definitely the former #marmite

6. PJ Harvey – Let England Shake: I can’t say I have ever been a huge PJ Harvey fan and it took me a long time to bother with this album even after the near unanimous praise and the Mercury prize– but boy is it good. Throughout the album PJ acts as a sort of English historian and war correspondent telling the tales of World War I while still including catchy hooks and great compositions  #greatwargreatalbum

5. David Kilgour and the Heavy Eights – Left by Soft: Disclaimer: anything made by members of the Flying Nun fraternity immediately moves up a few spots on my lists. Even with that this is still a great record.  You get the impression that Kilgour could bang out indie-pop hits in his sleep. #tallyho

4. Peaking Lights – 936: This is a very unique album. Part psych, part dub part woozy drug fuelled haze. It is repetitive but never monotonous. It is expansive but very DIY. It sounds like sunny a San Francisco day but was made in Wisconsin. # analoguealbumdigitalworld.

3. Jay Z & Kanye West – Watch the Throne: Definitely not the best hip hop album I have ever heard, it’s not even as good as Yeezy’s 2010 effort ‘My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy’. But what it does have going for it, is that it is one of the most fun and quotable rap albums in years. #fishfillet

2. Girls – Father, Son, Holy Ghost: Their third release in 3 years and they get keep getting better and better. If you don’t know them here are the Cliff Notes. Lead singer Christopher Owens was a former member of the Children of God cult. His brother was murdered in said cult. He was forced as a child to busk to make money for the cult. As a teenager he escaped, travelled the world until a Texas millionaire took him under his wing. Now he takes loads of drugs and makes unbelievable music inspired by 50s and 60s pop. To say he wears his heart on his sleeve is an incredible understatement, his lyrics are extremely open and honest and he has a great ear for melody. Girls are my favourite band in the world right now by a long distance. #swoon

1. Nicolas Jaar – Space is Only Noise: If Girls are my favourite band, Nicolas Jaar is my favourite artist (I even dedicated a whole mix to him here). If you don’t know him already he is a 21 year old Chilean living in NY who splits his time between studying comparative literature and making music that is part house, part world, part hip hop. His debut album is unbelievable, his live shows are fantastic and he remixes everyone from Nina Simone to Missy Elliot. Go check him out right now #notenoughsuperlatives

Hm…

I know…

I mean, I’m not the smartest woman in the world (yes, I am), but why can’t anyone fucking find Gaddafi?

Huh?

Is he dead?

Perhaps…

…or is he…

LIVE IN BANGKOK!!!!!

For more from Dan check out HitDanBack.com

Sweden is also home to a long-term social democratic government, which means, among other things, cheap or free public services.  But its not just boring stuff like tertiary education and health care.  The Swedish Government also likes to try out its creative side with free arts and music!

Like Malmöfestivalen, a ten day free city festival in Sweden’s third largest city, Malmö.  Initially I thought this would be one of those lame city festivals with bouncy castles and whiny country singers.  Thus I was pleasantly surprised with the lineup of international acts such as Coco Rosie, Best Coast, Iron and Wine and NOFX and a slew of local Swedish artists.  So I thought why not check out a few gigs and give you guys some tips on Scandinavian music.

I must admit that I am no stranger to Swedish music having been a longtime fan of obscure indie bands such as Dungen and Convoj and better-known ones such as The Hives, The Knife and Lykke Li.  Yet when I arrived here I learnt that Sweden had much more than indie to offer.  One genre that the Swedes have made their own is pop.  Swedes love their pop and support a thriving scene of local artists that are basically unheard of abroad.

I haven’t exactly been a pop enthusiast in the past, equating the genre with over-production and lack of talent.  So, I was decidedly skeptical when my Swedish boyfriend wanted to take me to watch Daniel Adams-Ray and Veronica Maggio, two popular Swedish artists.

My skepticism soon gave way to finger-clicking gaiety as both artists performed a polished set with energy, talented vocals and 10 piece backup bands.  It proved to me that pop, especially live pop, can sound great provided artists keep the focus on the music rather than distract the audience with smoke and mirrors.  Check out Veronica Maggio’s biggest hit here in Sweden, Jag Kommer (which translates to ‘I’m Coming’, read what you will into that).

Not exactly your run of the mill overtly sexed-up pop video huh?

But Swedish music has more to offer than indie and pop.  Unlikely as it is, Sweden has a pretty healthy hip-hop scene (it’s OK, I laughed too).  While some Swedish hip-hop artists have non-Swedish ethnic heritage, Movits! are Swedish through and through.  They have gained attention in Sweden (and, bizarrely, in the US after Stephen Colbert ‘discovered’ them back in ’09) with their unusual combination of swing jazz hip-hop.  I checked them out about 6 months ago on their national tour for the release of new album Ut Ur Min Skalle (Get Out of My Head).  Even though I hadn’t heard their music before, it was one of the most fun and energetic gigs I had experienced in some time.

The Devilishy Handsome Movits!

So I was pumped to see them again at Malmöfestivalen.  Massive props should be given to any act that can get a crowd from lukewarm shuffling and head-nodding to jumping in unison doing the rap hand (especially at a free festival in broad daylight).  The cherry on top was the appearance of two of Sweden’s biggest rappers, Timbuktu and Promo, and the addition of live trumpet and double bass.  I already can’t wait for my third Movits! experience!

Here is one of the singles from Ut Ur Min Skalle, Sammy Davis Jr.

And for those of you curious about the lyrics, here’s a version with English subtitles!

“This festival can’t get any better!” I hear you say.  Alas, it can.  It also sports an impressive commitment to the environment.  Both drinking water and recycling stations abound aplenty and it was compulsory for all vendors of coffee or tea to serve organic and fair trade.

I’m sure that it comes as no surprise to most of you that Sweden is therefore an awesome place to live.  Of course, such a glorious existence comes at a price – Sweden’s notoriously high income taxes.  But, as my free-rider student existence doesn’t expose me to such harsh realities, my Sweden is merely a giant fantasyland filled with unfairly attractive people and free shit.  What can I say?  Life is hard.

The first and most obvious anomaly is that a Queenslander’s winter bears little resemblance to the season’s conventional definition.  A relentlessly balmy mid-twenties temperature dictates shorts and singlets/tees in daylight hours, hard to beat when you’ve been flogging jeans since April.  The cold eventually comes with the dark, at which point you are literally fucked if you haven’t adequately prepared.  Thermals reaped greater returns than the gumboots this week.  After twenty-four hours of foot traffic along the main arterials and a complete absence of rain, the place is a veritable dustbowl.  Photos take on a hazy sheen and moisture becomes currency.  Preparation for the inevitability of dust in this situation is more difficult and no one seems to be bothered by the whole affair, aside from the mild inconvenience of settling into some sort of lens cleaning routine.

The setup of the festival facilities is pretty close to ideal.  Woodford hosts a number of similar festivals each year and experience has driven efficiency.   Food outlets range from sports ground burger-and-fries type situations up to sit down options on par with your local (acceptable but not great) Indian and Italian joints.  Clothing and trinket stalls are abundant but slightly unnecessary.  That seems to be the beauty of the situation, that there is really much more there than you need.  If you want to be lead in morning meditation by a creep with one dreadlock you can pretty much guarantee that Splendour is on it.  One minor gripe was waiting an hour for showers each morning, offset by the fact that they were hot and adequate and the English chap in the line wants to chat sport.

For better or worse, decades of alcohol abuse in Australasia means that mid-strength alcohol at major congregations has become the status quo.  The wily crone figures out by Sunday that the wine bar has got the juice and a strict regimen of two-hourly frenzies is the most fruitful way to go about business.  Failing this, the only option is to see a man about a dog.  In this instance, ‘Te Reo’ fits the stereotype of the festival guy-with-the-things nicely.  He is comically elusive, his product is slightly insipid and overpriced, but less so than the beer and Te Reo is fluent in your lack of other viable options.  You can’t knock that.

As far as mid-winter getaways go, Splendour is a pretty damn good one.  Australia has produced some pretty repulsive politicians and quick bowlers of late but the youths are great.  However, I would like to publicly condemn the asshole that broke into my tent and watered down my scotch.  Assholes aside, it was a beautiful three days in the sun and you really, really, can’t knock that.

THE JUICE

This weekend Dunedin is transforming into a party town (well, more so than usual). On Friday night the R&V: Origins concert will be rocking, and on Saturday the centre of the city is being turned into a snow park!

To celebrate such a ridiculously fun weekend, we are giving away two tickets to R&V Origins and the Emberley VIP Lounge + the Official Afterparty, valued at around $1 million! This party is where you wanna be if you’d like to listen to tunes, chat up hot snowboarders, drink some booze and lie about who you are in order to get some ass.

To enter comment below and tell us why you think Emberley should give you the tickets. Best answer wins.

For more info check out Octagon Rail Jam and Official After Party

(I know it’s been out for a month already but living in Scandinavia surrounded by statuesque Nordic babes sometimes distracts me from keeping tabs on the Australasian music scene mmkay.)

The above release from Aussie outfit Gotye featuring New Zealand’s own Kimbra got me excited for a number of reasons.

First of all, it’s just a damn good song.  Gotye doing what he does best – the reggae/dub strum rhythm, drummer-boy percussion and of course Wally De Backer’s strong, emotionally-charged vocals.  Gotye is no stranger to the jilted lover theme – check out the lyrics to Heart’s a Mess – however he cleverly utilizes an underused love song storyline here to which listeners obviously relate.  However, he avoids the cliché trap by crafting the lyrics with humanity and honesty.  The pop-friendly chorus and a less-is-more approach instrumentally also give Somebody That I Used To Know a kick of accessibility that previous Gotye singles have lacked.

Another strong point of this release is of course the video.  Natasha Pincus employs an interactive arts and crafts approach (which brought to mind this creepy Flight of the Conchords moment) to create a kaleidoscopic part-human canvas.  Gotye’s magnetic performance enhances Pincus’ visually arresting set, which is a pleasant surprise given he rarely features in his videos. This may have been a factor in the video’s success on youtube – while Gotye’s previous sci-fi-esque animated videos were impressive, his strong presence in this video heightens the emotional intensity of the song.

And of course, the thing that makes this song/video REALLY awesome is of course: Kimbra.  Now I will admit straight off the bat that I have been, for many years, an unashamed Kimbrafile. I won’t go into what I have preached before, suffice to say Kimbra’s mega-talented and y’all will convert sooner or later because this girl is gonna be BIG.

As the Hamiltronian still hasn’t released her debut album, I have been reduced to scrounging around for morsels that fall off the back of the production wagon.  So I was delighted to learn that Kimbra was featuring on Gotye’s new hit.  Not entirely surprising given both artists share producer Francois Tetaz and Kimbra has covered Gotye’s songs in the past.  But still, a stroke of genius nonetheless.  Kimbra’s vocal strength is a fine match for De Backer and, just quietly, their unfair genetic advantage combined with all the half-nakedness in the video is pretty damn hot.

And finally, it got me flippin’ excited because both of these artists have impending album release dates at the end of this month.  Props to whoever was behind this bad boy because not only is it a gorgeous song and a creatively inspiring video, it is also a bloody good piece of strategy.  Hell, I’ll be the first to admit that this video was directly responsible for my interest in Gotye’s upcoming album.  And it looks like I’m not the only one interested, given that this song is currently no. 1 in the Australian itunes downloads charts.  In fact, when I started writing this article the youtube clip was at just over 800,000 views and is now at 1.1 million and counting (despite being online for merely one month).

There you have it amigos.  Do yourselves a favour and jump onto itunes, or do it the old school way and head to your local record store, on the following dates to snap up these tasty Australasian musical offerings:

19 August – Making Mirrors by Gotye

29 August/2 September– Vows by Kimbra (New Zealand and Australian release dates respectively)

1. It’s a fucking amazing way to spend three days. Would recommend to anyone. Especially you.

2. If you hang out in the campgrounds, you might spot a rural Aussie gal rocking a pole dance routine on the back of a trailer.

3. Kimbra would open with ‘Gz and Hustlas’ by Snoop. Awesome. H-Town pride.

4. At 1am two drink tickets and a Tic Tac can buy you a plate of nachos with two cheeses and extra sauce. Extraordinary.

5. Australia has a heap of musical talent. The Jezabels being one such example.

6. That Virgin would terrify their passengers by placing this ad in their in-flight magazine on Sydney-Brisbane flights.

7. That a drunken Irishman named Zak could come up with golden one-liners like “No one likes Aussies. I’m half Australian and I don’t even like Australians” and “I look  a lot like Jeff Goldblum. Slip a pair of glasses on me and you’re in Jurassic Park.”

8. Chris Martin and Coldplay would make me so emotional. Heart-warming stuff. The perfect finale to a glorious weekend. See you there next year.

Mariah Carey – Honey

This 90s RnB hit which culminates in typical Mariah dog yelps is clearly about a part of the male anatomy that drips… err honey. Primarily written by Carey and Diddy, this song and its accompanying film clip pushed Mariah’s image from cutesy RnB wailer to sexy diva. And with lines like “Honey you can’t describe, how good it feels inside” why wouldn’t it?

Lady Gaga – Love Games

Gaga is not one to shy away from the controversial and apart from her meat-inspired clothing choices I’d say this has to be one of her greatest moves, a true testament to her expertise in using the blatantly sexual to create commotion – not that that’s a bad thing. Quote “Let’s have some fun, this beat is sick. I wanna take a ride on your disco stick.” If you don’t get how this song is about peen, go back to Year 7 health class.

Grace Jones – Pull Up To The Bumper

Androgynous alien cyborg, exotic jungle temptress, glitter disco princess, hard partying fashion model – its a known fact that Grace Jones can be whoever she wants and do whatever the fuck she wants and this extends to her penchant for releasing songs so sexy, just listening to them can send you into a frenzied masturbation trance. One of these is Pull Up To The Bumper, an 80s pop track that unashamedly talks about big black dick. Using the metaphor of a car, of course. Correction “a long black limousine” to be exact.

Ciara – Ride

First of all, watch the film clip. As the saying goes a picture says a thousands words and a set of moving pictures that involve a bangin chick in scanty costumes booty poppin and singing about how well she rides the beat translates to: I LIKE TO COWGIRL IN BED. This woman can dance-hump air, sexily. Enough said.

Goldfrapp - Oh la la la

There are many synonyms for the word penis and I like using them all. Cock, dick, wang, member, peen, willie, love wand (OK maybe not that one) are all terms that we can use to explain the male sex organ and are fortunately in existence so we never have to use the phrase “the male sex organ”. But I have never called it “Oh la la la”. It seems to work for Allison Goldfrapp though and who am I to judge? Allison spends most of her time on this disco-inspired synth track telling everyone she wants “oh la la la la la” which transforms the idea of dick from something fleshy and everyday to something magical and glittery. Well, in my mind at least.